Yeah, there are some things that are thrust upon you without you having much say. Your gender, for instance. Your race. Who your parents are. The environment you grew up in. The food your parents forced you to eat and rules they made you follow. I know, and I’ve been there.
I also know that there comes a point where you can start to flex your own decision-making muscles. You can choose where to live and where to work and who to start a relationship with and how to dress and what to eat and how to communicate. At some point, you have to start making the choices that you will come to own.