“The party was wack.”
“Because no one was there.”
How do you know?
“I was there.”
So you’re a nobody?
Almost every time I travel within a city, I prefer to be the driver. Even when it will cost me gas money and put miles on my tires. Why? Because I like the feeling of being in control. Of the music. Of the directions. I like to move fast, and most people drive too damn slow for my comfort.
Another good reason: I hate being uncomfortable temperature-wise. I like to make it as cold or as hot as I like.
I’ve always been the type of person who’s looked at things differently than most people. Oddball. Outcast. Dre, you always gotta be different! These were not meant to be compliments.
I woke up this morning before my alarm clock. Grabbed my phone and checked my Twitter feed. I usually don’t do this first-thing. Having an empty mind as I was coming from sleep, uncluttered by hours of conscious thoughts, I saw something on my feed that had always been there, but it dawned on me clearly this particular time: It was 96% full of thermometers.
What’s a thermometer? Well, you know what a thermometer is, but me being me, it is of course being used as a metaphor. A thermometer is a person who steps into an environment, looks around, and reports on what is happening. You can easily spot a thermometer by their use of inclusion in statements letting you know that the rest of the herd agrees with the thermometer (or vice-versa) — AND anyone who doesn’t is obviously wrong.
No one was at the party — I know because I was there. Everybody thinks Kanye’s album will be album of the year. I know it’s true — everybody is saying the same thing! You’re the ONLY ONE saying something different!
The value proposition of a thermometer is I’m going to tell you what’s happening. Twitter is a breeding ground for thermometers. Always has been. Twitter is where being a thermometer is celebrated and positively reinforced with retweets and crying-face emojis.
And Twitter is necessary. I still use and love Twitter — it tells me who won the NBA/NFL games yesterday, the breaking news on CNN & ESPN, anything I really need to know in politics (not much), which rapper dissed the other rapper on Instagram, which album is coming out soon. Basically, Twitter informs me just enough so I can converse with the sheep of life and sound like I think the same way they do when I really don’t. Kinda like a woman dates a guy who she knows is not worthy of a long-term relationship but she keeps him around because the sex is good. And humans need sex just like we need relate-ability (word correction? Help me out) and connection.
I can relate to the thermometers of life because I have to: 99% of people are thermometers. They buy my programs, read my books and get motivated for a few days, like my Instagram posts, retweet and favorite (some of) my tweets. You, reading this, probably are one. There’s a 1% chance I’m wrong. And I’ll explain the 1% as thermostats.
Again, you know what a thermostat is, and again, this is a metaphor: thermostats are the people who step into an environment and make things happen there. As the literal device in your home does, thermostats determine what the temperature will be, allowing the thermometers to report the news. Basically, thermostats do the things that give thermometers something to talk about. Without thermostats doing things, thermometers would be bored and lonely.
Want to see proof of this in action? Go to your Twitter feed right now and tell me what you see. A bunch people talking about what some other peolpe are doing. Right or wrong?
Now allow me to address the contrarians. Well, isn’t it important to know what’s going on, Dre? What about the news people? You need to be informed in life! Yes, knowing the news is necessary in some cases. And I addressed that here.
What you should know, is that anything that is actual news will always find you — you don’t have to go seeking it. If a hurricane or tornado is coming to your town, you don’t need to check Twitter to find out. Twitter gives you news — petty news. Thermometer news. News for people who would have nothing to do if they weren’t talking about the comings and goings of thermostats. Facebook is a larger sounding board for thermometers (which I also love, but not for the reasons thermometers do).
So how do you know which you are? Honestly, by this post of this post, I’ll use one of my mother’s favorite phrases: you know good and damn well which one you are.
Ask yourself a question today. Am I doing things that get talked about, or talking about the people who are?
I’m fully aware that grey areas exist; for this conversation there are none. My belief is that thought we all partake in each area at times, in general you are either one or the other and it’s pretty clear to me. For example, the people I consider friends — who I talk business and would do business with, bounce ideas off of, seek counsel from — are all thermostats. I have association with many, many, MANY thermometers, and I keep the relationships surface. I can only talk them for so long before my brains stats turning to mush. And it usually takes less then 180 seconds of conversation before their thermometer-ness comes out.
Well, who else is doing it? I asked around and no one really agreed with the idea. Let me talk to a few people and see what they think before I decide.
Can thermometers be good people? YES! I only deal with good people. 99% of them are thermometers. I don’t hate them or wish them ill will. There are just certain conversations I can only have with certain people. As a matter of fact, I shouldn’t even be writing this to the public. The thermometers who made it this far — welcome — are agreeing with what I’m saying but still have a problem: They can’t start thinking or acting this way because everyone will be wondering what the hell happened to them.