Right now, there is something you’re striving to get better at. There are people out there who are better than you at it and who could very well help you. The challenge is, these people are either trying to get better themselves or at least maintain what they have — and by the circle of 5 rule, hanging around you will bring them down.
And not everyone is so charitable when it comes to their own self- interest. Dislike this fact of life if you wish, it’s still true.
So how can you get around these people and let them rub off on you?
You have to find a way to make yourself valuable.
Value is a relative term, meaning each person has their own idea of what is valuable and each situation can alter what that value is. Canned goods are valuable to the March of Dimes but not so much to the guy who employs a private chef.
Your job is to identify — not ask, but identify (asking gives them another job to do) — what would be valuable to another person and provide it without being granted permission. Take initiative and demonstrate that you’re the type of person who creates value without being told what to do or how to do it. These types of people are so rare this pretty much guarantees success.
- Most people don’t want to do work they’re not being directly paid for (these are people who have been raised on the idea of, and lived the life of employees for so long, they don’t understand investing. Investments can be made of time, effort and goodwill, in addition to money. Many people lack the vision to see further than the next 24 hours or next paycheck).
- Most don’t want to take initiative (when someone gets so used to only acting after being told what to do, the initiative muscle atrophies and wastes away).
- Most fear their offering will be rejected and they’ve “done all this work for nothing” (again, investments. Make a habit of creating value for ten people, at least one will pay you back and make up for the other nine — but you have to do it for all ten FIRST. I’ve just turned off 98% of people with this one).
When you create value, people will want you around. When you’re not around, they’ll ask where you went. And if you’re not around enough, they’ll give you whatever you need to ensure you’ll be around more often. Thing is, no one is going to tell you exactly who to do it.
If it were that easy, it wouldn’t be valuable.