No Use Being Self-Conscious — No One Is Thinking About You Anyway

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Living in Miami for some time, I have found myself explaining a certain principle to several people over the years. Most of the time it goes as follows.

Person X is self conscious or worried about their appearance and/or what other people’s opinions will be of Person X’s looks. I always say the same thing in response.

“This is South Beach — no one here cares how you look. Look around — everyone here is worried about how they look. ”

This applies to the rest of life as well. Every individual out there, think of one person you interacted with today, with as much as a “Hello.” What’s the biggest problem or challenge in that person’s life right now? Why is it a challenge and what are their options for action? For the few of you who can answer the first question, I doubt you can explain questions two and three. Ask those same questions of your own life, though, and you can fill in all the details.

We are all tuned into the radio stations of ME-FM. What takes up the lion’s share of space in our minds is ourselves. Look around you — everyone else is the same way. So when you are self-conscious about possibly failing or embarrassing yourself or what others may think, stop flattering yourself. People may focus their attention on you for a few minutes, talk about you and even engage their emotions in some cases. But the aim of 90% of a human’s actions is how it affects them. Every person you see or know or meet is starring in their own life’s show.

You are merely an audience member who wandered onto the stage.