To Avoid Fading Into the Crowd, This Works Like Crazy…

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I usually run on Saturday mornings. Having done so consistently since 2017 without a break longer than a few days, I decided to take a couple weeks off and let my legs recover. On the first Saturday of my hiatus, I took a walk in South Beach. 

South beach on a nice weekend morning assures you of one thing: a plethora of attractive  women doing photo and video shoots. Some were modeling clothes, others were doing “workout” videos that double as soft porn on Instagram. 

I remember ten or so years ago when I was active in the modeling world and meeting many such females. They were a dime a dozen, disappearing just as quickly as they came, always replaced by three more girls new to the game. 

On my walk, I noticed that the game hadn’t changed at all in a decade. All that had changed were the players and the technology: you don’t even need a photographer anymore (at least not a professional one). A tripod, smartphone and the right apps make for the perfect shoot. 

I wondered how any of these females could carve out a space and stand out when pretty girls are so easy to find in South Florida. For every one who leaves town, five move in. Every time one gets older and decides to stop doing shoots, start a family and get into real estate, ten more young ones fresh out of college are eager to take their place. 

How can a good-looking person stand out when good looks are a commodity? 

This is not limited to photo and video shoot girls in Miami Beach. It applies to athletes on sports teams. Authors looking to sell books. Speakers who want to give speeches. Men with fancy sports cars angling to catch the eye of certain women (another South Florida phenomenon). 

I talked about it on my Instagram story that morning as I walked: When a pretty face / 6-pack abs / motivational message / luxury car is a normal thing to see, you’re gonna need more than that to stand out. 

It’s not that these things are not useful to have. I, for example, used to play professional sports, and now I talk about mindset (amongst other things). There are a lot of people who fit that description. Why? Because being a former athlete works to draw attention! 

The next step, what can separate one from the rest, is where many fail. 

I put a name to my philosophy (Work On Your Game). I created a process for using it, with steps to be followed. I did some things that are hard to duplicate (wrote books, did TEDxTalks, published a ton of content) to lessen the possibility of duplicates. When I see other ways to make clear that I’m different, I use them. 


What can you offer that they can’t offer? 

When you have an answer, emphasize it all out of proportion. I heard someone say, if your horse can jump a ditch, advertise that your horse can jump the Grand Canyon. Is it true? Not exactly — but the idea goes in the same direction as the truth. After all, it’s the imagery that sticks in someone’s mind. 


Keep in mind that it also matters whose attention you’re after. Not everyone wants something unique — some people want the same, just a different version of it. 

I was in a Publix (grocery store) in South Beach sometime in 2013-14. I saw a really attractive woman checking out of a different line a bit before I’d checked out. We made eye contact, but she didn’t stop to wait for me; she exited the store as I paid for my goods. 

I watched her get on the elevator — all the parking for this location was on the second floor. I had walked to the store, as I lived 4 blocks from this Publix at the time. I had no need to go to the parking garage, but that’s where she was going.

I checked out at the register and took the elevator up, then, for only one purpose. 

She was easy to find, loading her bags into the back of a white Range Rover. I approached and we spoke for maybe 2 minutes. Up close, I could see that she’d had some work done, both from the neck-up and from the waist-down, but done tastefully enough so as not to be too obvious from afar. 

Noticing the grocery bags I held, she asked, “where’s your car?” She asked this with slight widened eyes. That twinkle told me that my answer to this question would be either the clincher or the death blow to our interaction. My answer was somewhere in the middle: I told her the truth, that I was on the second floor only to speak to her. 

She smiled and said I was “cute.” 

I asked what she had planned for the night (life moves fast in South Beach). Nothing much, she replied. We exchanged info and I told her I’d call later. 

I did. She never replied. 

If you’re looking to develop a clear offer — of yourself or your product — that differentiates you from the me-too folks, take the Sell Yourself Course in Work On Your Game University so we can not only get your work seen, but also get you paid for it. 

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